Preparing for death may seem daunting.
Breathe into the places of your resistance,
then choose a section of the Lasting Gifts Manual and begin.
This is your remembrance;
your gift, to those you leave behind.
living will
Family History
I cannot pretend I am invincible. My family history reminds me that I will die. My father had a massive heart attack and died at age 54. My brother suffered a debilitating heart attack at 47. My mother had a massive stroke at age 54; her mother at age 48; and her mother at age 45. Seeing this history on paper helps me to stay conscious of my vulnerability to heart disease.
I made a promise to my son that I would do everything I can to keep my body healthy. If I am to be true to that promise, then I must take seriously my need to exercise regularly, eat heart-healthy foods, and maintain a heart-healthy weight.
Having a written family history is a gift to me. This history also gifts my son, so that he will know his genetic vulnerabilities.
Explore and record your own and your family’s medical history, then take some time to sit with it and see its messages. What does your personal and family medical history have to teach you? Recording your knowledge and observations can assist your children and their children in navigating their own health.
-Kim
The Remembrance of Death
“Day by day remind yourself that you are going to die.”
Death became my companion when I was 15 years old. My dad died suddenly of a massive heart attack. A year and a half later, my mother had a stroke and we were told that she would not live five years. Although she beat the odds and lived over 30 more years, death became a constant part of my life.
Every decision to travel or move brings the realization that Mom may die while I am gone. The gift of these experiences is that I have lived my life embracing the reality of death, allowing it to propel me forward.
The process if completing the Lasting Gifts manual is an opportunity to engage in the practice of the remembrance of death. I believe, if we really embrace that we are going to die one day, we will live our lives more fully. If we live knowing that each moment or each day may be our last, then we are less likely to get stuck in the small stuff of life and to savor that which is true and real.
When I sit with my own death, I think of my husband, Niko, and my son, Sam. If I die today, I want Niko to be able to focus on his own grief and to be there for our son. The best way I can help him with that is to have things in order to make the transition as easy as possible.
The many forms in this manual may seem daunting.
Breathe into the places of your resistance,
then choose a section and begin.
This is your remembrance;
your gift to those you leave behind.