Tag Archives: death and dying

The Remembrance of Death

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“Day by day remind yourself that you are going to die.”

-The Rule of Benedict, Ch. 4

 Death became my companion when I was 15 years old. My dad died suddenly of a massive heart attack. A year and a half later, my mother had a stroke and we were told that she would not live five years. Although she beat the odds and lived over 30 more years, death became a constant part of my life.

Every decision to travel or move brings the realization that Mom may die while I am gone. The gift of these experiences is that I have lived my life embracing the reality of death, allowing it to propel me forward.

The process if completing the  Lasting Gifts manual is an opportunity to engage in the practice of the remembrance of death. I believe, if we really embrace that we are going to die one day, we will live our lives more fully. If we live knowing that each moment or each day may be our last, then we are less likely to get stuck in the small stuff of life and to savor that which is true and real.

When I sit with my own death, I think of my husband, Niko, and my son, Sam. If I die today, I want Niko to be able to focus on his own grief and to be there for our son. The best way I can help him with that is to have things in order to make the transition as easy as possible.

The many forms in this manual may seem daunting.
Breathe into the places of your resistance,
then choose a section and begin.
This is your remembrance;
your gift to those you leave behind.

-Kim